Chapter 1

AuthorFire · 2011-09-24, 02:28 AM

Ting-Ting-ting! (Clock Ringing)

"Ryan come eat your breakfast!" called his Mom Bella.
"Ok!" Ryan yelled back downstairs while taking off his P.j's.
Ryan ran down to brush his teeth and wash his face.
"Whats for breakfast?" Ryan asked.
"Your favorite hot chocolate , cookies, and a good bake of a pie."
said Mom.
"Whoo pie...." said Ryan. "Ill have a neat day today.
"Professor told you to go to the lab and he left this weird looking ball."
Mom said with a confused face.
Ryan open and he was surprised to see a real Charmander.
Here's your breakfast honey.
After Ryan got done eating he head off to the labatory.
iLL CONTINUE

Ill continue im going to sleep.

Ghost · 2011-09-24, 02:38 AM

I dont get the title Tongue

SparrowHawk · 2011-09-24, 04:08 AM

Does any1 else know what is wrong here?

This is what I see :

1. Useless "stories" are being created.
2. Useless "stories" are not being continued. At all.

Grey · (This post was last modified: 2011-09-24, 04:26 AM by Grey.)

Umm...Wat? @.@ There's no storyline whatsoever...the grammars pretty bad, there's some words missing, and some extra descriptions would be good...*realizes he sounds slightly like Nitz*

Ghost · 2011-09-24, 04:41 AM

He neeeever finishes his stories, but to be honest i never read them anymore.

SparrowHawk · 2011-09-24, 04:56 AM

(2011-09-24, 04:41 AM)Ghost Wrote: He neeeever finishes his stories, but to be honest i never read them anymore.

This one isn't even a paragraph let alone a chapter Dodgy

SkyRock · 2011-09-24, 12:14 PM

We have same character name Ryan.

orboknown · 2011-09-24, 04:56 PM

(2011-09-24, 04:08 AM)Deidara Wrote: Does any1 else know what is wrong here?

This is what I see :

1. Useless "stories" are being created.
2. Useless "stories" are not being continued. At all.

in all honesty, you didnt finish your stories either dei.as didnt grey or ghost. Nitz is the only one who has put a full story in place.

SparrowHawk · 2011-09-24, 04:58 PM

(2011-09-24, 04:56 PM)orboknown Wrote:
(2011-09-24, 04:08 AM)Deidara Wrote: Does any1 else know what is wrong here?

This is what I see :

1. Useless "stories" are being created.
2. Useless "stories" are not being continued. At all.
in all honesty, you didnt finish your stories either dei.as didnt grey or ghost. Nitz is the only one who has put a full story in place.

Not that. I'm talking about all the Chapter 1s he created '-'

And it's too long to create a whole story r.r I don't like writing books.

orboknown · 2011-09-24, 05:09 PM

(2011-09-24, 04:58 PM)Deidara Wrote:
(2011-09-24, 04:56 PM)orboknown Wrote:
(2011-09-24, 04:08 AM)Deidara Wrote: Does any1 else know what is wrong here?

This is what I see :

1. Useless "stories" are being created.
2. Useless "stories" are not being continued. At all.
in all honesty, you didnt finish your stories either dei.as didnt grey or ghost. Nitz is the only one who has put a full story in place.
Not that. I'm talking about all the Chapter 1s he created '-'

And it's too long to create a whole story r.r I don't like writing books.

write a oneshot then.

SparrowHawk · 2011-09-24, 05:13 PM

(2011-09-24, 05:09 PM)orboknown Wrote:
(2011-09-24, 04:58 PM)Deidara Wrote:
(2011-09-24, 04:56 PM)orboknown Wrote:
(2011-09-24, 04:08 AM)Deidara Wrote: Does any1 else know what is wrong here?

This is what I see :

1. Useless "stories" are being created.
2. Useless "stories" are not being continued. At all.
in all honesty, you didnt finish your stories either dei.as didnt grey or ghost. Nitz is the only one who has put a full story in place.
Not that. I'm talking about all the Chapter 1s he created '-'

And it's too long to create a whole story r.r I don't like writing books.
write a oneshot then.

I already did.

orboknown · 2011-09-24, 05:13 PM

then problem solved.

SparrowHawk · 2011-09-24, 05:14 PM

(2011-09-24, 05:13 PM)orboknown Wrote: then problem solved.

This is about AuthorFire, not me.

Dodgy

orboknown · 2011-09-24, 05:16 PM

rawr.
he just needs to focus on one thing for more than 5 seconds.